Lord, I lay out my fleece for your words, unctionings, knowings, and be tender with me like the child I am.

That means slowing down and attending to Him speaking to us. When we’re freaking out and don’t know what to do, or if the situation will work out. It means regulating and calming ourselves to be reminded that He’s our shepherd and listening for His still small voice (1 Kings 19:11-13).

Surrendering to His unconditional love and grace has been much harder than I’d imagined. But then I look up and out and I see Him.

“Many people will talk about a testimony when it’s come to pass, but not many will talk about it when they are still in the hallway”.

Daughter,

If you are not content with me, no husband, no career, friendships, or finances will ever be enough for you.

You may be hiding what’s in your heart from yourself, others, and even God. But the Word tells us that he knows all and nothing is hidden from him.

I was a Christian, yet not able to believe in the redeeming work and finished work of Christ.

Vulnerability has changed my life. Vulnerability sat down with me, showed me who I was, and released the shame that kept me hiding in the dark. Safety was born from that place.

I had become so tired and weary that I had no choice but to ask God some hard questions. Why am I so sad? Why are things so hard for me? and Why doesn’t my faith look like theirs?

He died so that ALL might be saved. But I think while many complexities can land one in this place of unbelief I think the root of it is a misunderstanding of Who God is.

I believed in God growing up and was raised to have a fear of God that convicted me to not sin and consequently made me feel guilty for sinning but had no understanding of how “not to” sin through the power of Jesus Christ who frees us with grace and truth.